Lets be Honest here.
Sometimes you’re just utterly tired. Exhausted. Sometimes you just need a flippin minute. Or maybe you’ve just been pooped on or spit up on and you can’t always hold your precious little one 24/7.
So what do you do? You do what all parents do.
You put them down.
Yes! OMG I know! God forbid you put your child down for a few minutes to get some mommy time.
I believe that putting your child down for a while is actually good for them, they can learn independence and how to self soothe a bit. Every time the baby cries you don’t have to immediately rush to them. When you hear that whine come over the monitor just take a deep breath and count to 10. Sometimes they’re just talking in their sleep. Sometimes they’re actually awake and want you to come say hello, but that 10 seconds while breathing in can help you center yourself and prepare for “turning the mommy on.”
Maybe I should explain that a bit..
Like many people I was a completely different person before I was pregnant. Before I went through 12 hours of labor and pushed a baby out of my vagina I was something completely different.
I was a party girl, a full time art student, a dough throwing pizza chick. Literally, I worried about myself and my boyfriend of 6 years. Bills were all that ever were on my mind besides getting good grades. So when I hear that cry come over the monitor I have to mentally prepare myself.
Now don’t get me wrong.
I love my child more than anything in the world. Hell I never thought that I could even have children. So the fact that my little girl is in her crib asleep right now is the biggest blessing I could have ever hoped for. That being said, sometimes I have to push myself to be the best that I can be and prepare myself for what may come when I walk in that nursery.
So I breathe, count to 10, and then tend to her.
As a mother who is constantly dealing with postpartum depression and anxiety those extra 10 seconds can do a world of difference for how I handle a situation.
I mean, lets face it you can go in and there will be a smile on your baby’s face and you can pick them up and cuddle the crap out of them. Give them raspberries while you’re changing their diaper and have those babies chuckling themselves into your arms before your leaving the room. OR You can enter a freaking war zone. Screaming and tears with coughing because she’s got a runny nose and she leaked through her diaper during nap time because teething decided to bare its ugly head one more time and give your child diarrhea. So not only do you have to calm your poopy child down who just wants to be hugged and kissed while you’re simultaneously trying to take her clothes off so that you can see exactly how bad of a situation you’re dealing with. Then once you get in there and assess the damage she’s trying to wriggle out of the diaper faster than you can get it off of her and then all you’re left with is a child dangling over the edge of the changing table because you were quick enough to grab one foot before she lunged herself over the edge. Leaving a terror of poop smeared across the changing pad.
That’s just how it is, you either have a good experience or one that’s well.. not so good. I don’t like to call them bad because by the end of it yes you have a lot of poop to clean up but at least you can laugh about it.
Back to the point of this entire post I think that ultimately we, as parents, have to do a lot of things that we were never prepared for. Sometimes we have to put our babies down for the sake of our own sanity. If that means that I have to put her in the play pin for 10 minutes while Baby TV is on so that I can go in the next room with the monitor and just look at Facebook or read a magazine then I’m going to do it. She’s not going to die, you’re right there within ear shot.
Of course this goes without saying, but do this within reason (sometimes the dullest crayons in the box take things for granted and do it all the time ultimately stunting the child’s development).
So in the end I just want to say its okay, we all do it (well most of us there are those few super mommies that just “never do anything wrong” *rolls eyes*) the ugly truth is that sometimes you just need a minute.
*disclosure I do not support you leaving your child completely unattended in a bouncer/jumper/high chair or free range in the living room as injuries can occur please use the head that god gave you and be smart about the “minutes” you give yourself*